Attack on the Quidditch World Cup
by reader713
Summary: Amelia Bones never expected to sit next to the weirdest group of spectators at the Quidditch World Cup. Of course, she didn't expect the thwarted assassination attempt nor the attack on the campgrounds. And what's nail polish?


Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER!

It was the Quidditch World Cup.

Amelia Bones hadn't quite known what to think when she'd been given tickets to the Minister's Box, until she caught sight of a group of visitors.

Lucius Malfoy was there with his wife and son. Arthur Weasley had seats for himself, his four youngest children, Harry Potter and Hermione Granger. Barty Crouch's house-elf was holding his seat. The Bulgarian Minister of Magic was present. As was a group of rather strange people.

"Do you have to do that?" one grumbled.

"What?" the girl gave him a strange look. She was seated in her chair, one leg in the air so she could do something to her toes "they look pretty" she complained "and why are you reading?" she asked her companion "do you know how much we paid for these seats?"

He held up a small glass ball "spelled to be unbreakable don't you have a spell for doing that?"

"It's more fun to do it by hand" she beamed before turning to Susan and Hannah "don't you agree?"

"Um, what are you doing?" Susan asked, blushing slightly.

"Painting my toenails" she explained "nail polish is a special 'paint' one applies to nails. It's a muggle item, but I add potions that decrease risk of frostbite to my toes and fingers. Ask him" she pointed with her thumb at one of his companions.

"I use clear nail polish, thank you—please stop trying to damage my masculinity" her companion muttered.

"Insult nail polish again and I'll paint your nails neon pink" she growled "what masculinity? You scream like a girl" she went back to painting her toenails, humming under her breath.

"Um…" Hannah paused for a moment "are they different colors?"

"Well of course" she protested "like lipstick and make-up, you HAVE to have different colors. I mean, the mundanes have a hundred at least."

"Mundane?" Susan's brow furrowed in confusion.

"You call them muggles; we refer to them as mundanes or untalented, they are the 'normal' people after all" she rolled her eyes "there's even scientific proof of the fact, witches and wizards have recessive genes that represent magic. It's not quite that simple…but witches and wizards can be seen as people with a more common X-gene" she saw the two blank expressions "…you know, mutants?" she asked. Neither girl appeared to understand.

Amelia just continued to be amazed that she was capable of holding such an uncomfortable looking position.

"You English are so backward" she muttered under her breath "no offense, I blame your government" she glanced at Amelia "no offense to you, of course."

"You added potions to a muggle…?"

"…beauty product, yes, I did" she smiled almost smugly "helps me blend in if I do so."

Amelia glanced at the group, now that she noticed; they were dressed like muggles, not a robe among them, though some were dressed strangely.

"You do not blend in" one of her companions muttered.

She smiled brightly, and brought her foot down on his head.

"OUCH! What the hell-?"

"Say another world and I'll Silencio you both until next week" their reading companion threatened, ignoring his neighbor who snored loudly, head on his shoulder.

"Here" one of the group members announced, leaning around his friends to hand a piece of parchment to Amelia "it's a hobby of mine."

On the parchment was a breakdown of the wards surrounding the area, including a list of weaknesses, how it could be broken, and suggestions for improvement.

Hannah's neighbor had removed her foot "want me to paint your nails?" she offered "oh yeah" she beamed "I'm Claire, she's Meiling" she waved to a busty looking woman with red eyes and black hair "he's Ren" the male who was reading "lazy is Ken, my neighbor is Blake, he's Lavi" the guy in front of her "she's Rachel" a stunning young woman "and he's Shiki" a male with green hair who was drinking tea. She giggled, waggling a finger "no eyeing Lavi now, he's taken" she said before pausing "so is Blake."

"I'm soon-to-be-engaged" Blake said stiffly "that's different."

Lavi stuck his tongue out at him.

"Treat me with respect 'neko' or I'll give your lover my seat" Blake threatened.

Claire rolled her eyes, going back to painting her nails.

Amelia winced, listening to Meiling flirting heavily with the Weasley twins, though they appeared to also be discussing a business transaction.

"Wow! Look auntie!" Susan gaped as Ireland's mascots did their performance "gold!" she squealed.

"Fake gold, it'll fake, the fairy gold is only temporary" Claire told her "you would not believe the trouble it causes" she complained "if you're collecting bets, make sure to wait until at least a day after this time" she said "or insist on receiving sickles and knuts."

Amelia hadn't thought of that and was impressed.

Rachel was glancing at them. And abruptly smiled at Amelia "are you single?" she asked.

"Rachel!" Ren snapped "please leave off the sexual harassment!"

"What? I was just asking" she complained "why is it that you guys can ask out people but I can't? I mean, come on! Lavi was sexually molested once…in public! And now they're dating!"

"Not discussing this" Lavi almost squeaked.

Amelia winced as veelas came onto the field.

She was surprised by Claire's fast work at clapping a hand over Hannah and Susan's eyes as Rachel shot to her feet and attempted to tear off her shirt.

Lavi yelped and attempted to keep her shirt on. Ren grabbed Ken's belt to yank him back into his seat as he started to go over the rail. Meiling yelled out a…she decided it was a poem before Ren Silenciod her with use of a spell.

"Are they insane?" Claire hissed "someone could have been hurt. I mean, come on" she twitched angrily before waving her wand once more.

"What spell did you cast?" Amelia asked, having noted her waving her wand before covering Hannah and Susan's eyes.

"Everyone who attempted to go over the railing ran into a wall" she replied "one about an inch from the rail extending up for about five feet. We use it at zoos; it has a Confundus charm added in so you have no idea of what you did. Meiling, aren't you straight?"

"I'm bi" Meiling answered "men and women work for me. And those chicks look like they'll be AWESOME in bed."

"Was that supposed to be a love poem or a quote from the Pillow Book or the Tale of Genji?"

"I'm not sure."

"Why did…n't the veelas work on you?" Susan asked, blushing.

"I'm gay" Lavi said flatly "I'm in a homosexual relationship…it's also permanent. People in serious and/or longterm relationships are usually unaffected by veelas or those who are very much in love. Also…" he paused, wincing.

"He isn't interested in females" Meiling replied "they don't have the right equipment" she giggled "I like men and women; Rachel is lesbo. And I would know, can I just say that Rachel has the most amazing ton-…" her voice was cut off as Lavi forced an apple in her mouth.

"They were hot" Rachel's voice was disappointed "do you think they'd be into orgies?"

"Blake is engaged" Claire continued "or rather soon-to-be, and he loves her very much. Ken is straight and single, hence the aborted swan-dive. Ren…" she paused, glancing at the other male "I think he and Shiki are asexual" she whispered loudly "that means they aren't interested, you know, like plants?"

"And you?" Hannah asked, before blushing furiously.

"Ha hah" she raised a finger to her lips "se-cret" she said, but a ring was on her finger.

Amelia glared at Ludo Bagman, he should have kept this from happening! It could have ended badly.

"Who are you cheering for? I'm hoping Ireland will win" Hannah blushed.

"Neither" Claire replied promptly "or rather both, neither team has females so I'm unbiased. And both sides could have picked better mascots. The leprechaun gold can cause…make things rather ugly" she finished dryly before glancing at Amelia "you may want to do a couple diagnostic spells on gold being exchanged to keep people from cheating" she suggested "anyways, I'm not cheering for one team over the other. I'm not Irish OR Bulgarian" she went back to painting her toe-nails.

"W-where did your friend go?" Hannah asked, eyeing Ken's empty seat.

"He's still there, he's most likely embarrassed" she giggled, eyeing Rachel who had been tied firmly to her chair by Lavi.

"He's invisible?"

"Probably" she shrugged.

She continued to paint her toenails during the game, moving onto her fingernails when she was done. When she completed those she bullied Blake into blowing on her nails before painting his with a color she called 'skin-toned', his complaints were ignored, though she did warn Lavi that she would be painting his nails with his lover's name or initials once she was done with Blake's. Ren Silencioed Lavi when he began to protest.

Ren continued to read during the game. Meiling watched the game through a pair of Omnioculars, but from her comments she was watching the players more than the game. Rachel got bored partway through and fell asleep, snoring loudly. Ken became visible once again and cheered for both teams. Blake watched, muttering to himself that if a player fell…

Claire ignored the game in favor of her nail-painting.

Amelia wondered why they'd come if they were going to be so bored.

18-year old Richard Davenport was furious. Ireland was winning, but…he glared at the foreigner (well, Irish didn't count as foreigners in his mind) who had almost reached the snitch. He REFUSED to let this future dark wizard win the game. All dark wizards were evil and should…his lips curled into a smirk. He grasped his wand tightly and whispered the curse.

Amelia's grip on her niece's wrist was almost bruising as Susan screamed and Hannah gasped as Victor Krum's broom exploded.

She wanted to close her eyes, not see the young man fall to his death…

She blinked as Krum flew one foot before halting in mid-air.

In the crowds, there was another scream as a spectator was lifted into the air, trapped inside a golden cage.

"I made a mistake!" Claire wailed over Blake's fingers that had a streak of nail-polish across them caused by the first scream "FUCK THAT GUY!"

Shiki glanced at Amelia, expression that of boredom before calmly hopping over the railing and walking over to the floating Bulgarian seeker, never mind the fact that he was walking on air. He grabbed the seeker's wrist and dragged him back to the box.

"Claire, ask Madame Bones where she would like the culprit" Ren commented, having slammed his book closed when the broom exploded.

Claire looked at Amelia, an expression of curiosity on her face "your office or Azkaban?" she asked "or do the Bulgarians want him instead?"

"Deliver him to…" Amelia paused "Auror Kingsley."

"I'll add a letter with a memory sphere" she commented "Meiling" the other woman nodded and the cage vanished.

Blake and Rachel were fussing over the rather stunned seeker, both appearing to be healers. He appeared to be dealing with the idea that he had almost died that day.

Ken yawned widely "glad that worked out" he commented before turning to Amelia "see you later" he vanished.

"Done" Meiling sang and faded.

Rachel patted the seeker on his back before handing him a broom that Lavi held out to her "good luck on catching that snitch" she said, before handing the snitch to Bagman "here, we retrieved this as well" she said.

Krum nodded, clearly still dealing with the ordeal.

"Fuck" Blake muttered, glancing at his watch "I need to propose to Sharon in five minutes; if she says yes I'll be back tomorrow, if she says no you'll find my body in my bathtub" he announced before racing off.

"Go—fly!" Rachel ordered, pointing at the pitch and giving Krum a little push.

He nodded and complied.

Rachel looked satisfied, wiping her hands on her skirt "now, I believe that I deserve some chocolate" she announced "Claire, if you want I'll always be free for a romp or two, and Amelia" she beamed at the DMLE Head "if you ever want a date…" she protested as Lavi dragged her out, yelling about not wanting to get arrested for her soliciting again.

"Well, aren't you going to start?" Claire demanded, glaring at Bagman.

Despite what occurred, Bulgaria won, and Amelia found herself delighted, even though she shuddered to think about dealing with the young man in the cage. Claire had informed her that the cage had encased him due to a spell that tracked the curse to him before complaining that one fingernail was lighter than the others.

Ren remained nose-deep in his book. Shiki remained bored-looking, watching the game with apathy.

After he caught the snitch, Krum flew over and handed thanked them once more, assisted by the Bulgarian Prime Minister. Claire waved them away, protesting that it was nothing. She did, though, insist on teaching Krum a spell that ensured that if he fell off a broom that he wouldn't fall to the ground, it lasted three hours at the most she warned, but suggested that they suggest 'time-outs' be used in Quidditch to reapply the spell.

Ren ended up getting into a discussion of other spells Krum was interested in, and dealing with the profuse thanks from the entire team and coach, and Krum's parents and the Bulgarian Minister of Magic,

Claire frowned, playing with her bottle of nailpolish "I was going to give this to you" she informed Hannah before tossing it at the seat next to Crouch's house-elf, it broke on someone hidden under an invisibility cloak "but I hate cowards guilty of using Soul Magics more" she commented.

Amelia was in the midst of arresting Barty Crouch Jr., so missed Shiki walking over to Harry Potter to give him a kiss. Ren, in the midst of suggesting spellbooks to Hermione Granger glared at him.

"What?" Shiki asked "I was just greeting my pen-pal."

"SHIKI NADESHIKO TREMAINE! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE ASEXUAL!" Claire shrieked "NOT A PERVERT!"

Shiki ignored her in favor of setting up a date for his pen-pal's first Hogsmede weekend.

Amelia came to a halt and wanted to gape.

"Hello again!" Claire greeted cheerfully "you want?"

Amelia had been cursing when she had been informed of a group of Death Eaters deciding to 'play' with the muggle family.

At the moment, Rachel was looking over the muggle adults while another woman had drawn the children into playing a game of cards.

The group of Death Eaters had, she guessed, been dealt with. Ren was carrying bagged broken wands, each bag containing both halves. Blake was talking with a rather annoyed young woman wearing a ring with a large diamond whose foot was set firmly on the head of one of the Death Eaters.

Claire, Ren and Shiki were seated at a small card table. Claire was painting her nails again. Ren was reading and Shiki was drinking tea, when he wasn't pouring a liquid from the tea kettle onto a moaning Death Eater, from the way he was screaming when the liquid hit she was guessing it wasn't tea.

Ken was cracking his fingers, stretching before kicking another downed Death Eater in the side. Meiling was seated on another, while Rachel was standing on one, reading a book. Lavi was looking annoyed a prominent bite mark on his neck, another stranger obviously groping his ass while calmly dropping weights from a bag onto the Death Eater. The rest of the Death Eaters were tied up or floating in mid-air.

"We meet again!" Rachel added cheerfully "tonight looks busy, how about tomorrow?"

"Rachel" Ken said stiffly "would you be interested in someone who bared her breasts to the world?"

"Janet Jackson"

"Tell me you didn't TiVo it" Ken groaned.

"That was a wardrobe malfunction, not done on purpose" Lavi rolled his eyes "stop groping me" he snapped at his companion, walking away from him, firmly stepping onto a number of Death Eaters as he made his way over to the table. Rachel made a face before seating herself on Shiki's knee, ignoring how her foot was settled firmly on the Death Eater/Shiki's victim's groin.

"Wow" an Auror gaped at the group over Amelia's shoulder "I want to work with them."

"Sorry" Claire beamed "we're American 'concerned citizens', though some of us are Japanese. We made citizen arrests but they didn't cooperate. Can I paint your nails?"

Author's Note: This is from the universe of a different Harry Potter story I never wrote.


End file.
